In the Beginning…

by Mary S on January 28, 2012

I didn’t expect to be a caregiver for my parents. But that’s what life presented to me. I try to focus on not getting upset about the way things are,  but accepting the way life is and making the best of it.  I won’t lie and say I haven’t cried about it, but I did decide to channel those tears into

According to data published by, the typical U.S. caregiver is a 46 year-old woman who works outside the home and spends more than 20 hours per week providing unpaid care to her mother.  The majority of caregivers are middle-aged (35-64 years old).  Does this sound familiar?

Most caregivers live near the person they care for. But here’s the part that hurts the most…more than 7,000,000 of us live more than an hours’ drive away. I happen to live 2,000 miles away from Mom and Dad. They’re in Illinois; I’m in California.

There’s a lot I can’t do. But here’s what I’ve learned I can do from this far away.

I strive to help Mom manage her medications. The challenge for me is to honor the way she wants to do it and to keep quiet when the way she is doing it, to my mind, is more challenging than it has to be. To watch somebody choose the hard way—that’s tough for me.  But I want to let her live her life in the way she chooses. So that’s where the tension comes in. it’s walking that balance between helping mom and letting her live her own life.

Over time, I’ve worked out a way that supports her and gives me peace of mind.  I’m assembling the tips I learned the hard way and will be putting them into an easy-to-use e-book. I want you to have it so you can learn from our struggles. I’ll post it here when it’s ready.

Until next time,

{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }

Ab January 28, 2012 at 10:35 pm

good luck Mary!

Peter January 29, 2012 at 5:27 pm

Looking forward to learning more about making it easier to care for my parents.

Randy February 20, 2012 at 6:00 pm

Your story is really hitting home. My parents are in the exact situation as yours with their meds. While I don’t have to travel as far, it still will be difficult to organize for them as you have pointed out. I think I’m going to need a lot of tea as you recommend 🙂 . BTW, that Latin chart will come in handy. Best of luck Mary!

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